Welcome to a new thing I wanted to do on the blog - a Love Island rip off, essentially, a compilation of "Unseen Bits" from my week. Bits you wouldn't get shown on Instagram, funny bits from the week I captured on my phone, bits I would never normally put online. Since my revelation detailed in my last post that I ~really~ don't spend enough time living my present, I figured this might be a good way to do that?? It kind of worked in my head...

I also kind of wanted to scrap my monthly roundup posts. I enjoy doing them but at the same time, there's always a lot to go over and the whole "setting monthly goals" isn't that good for me and I think I just want to try something a bit different. So here goes nothing. This week's format will be a little different - it'll normally run Monday to Sunday, but given that I was on a residential with my NCS team last week I obviously couldn't take photos as a lot of them would've had young people in and I can't share them anywhere for very clear reasons. So this week will run Saturday to Sunday instead, but it will go back to normal afterwards.

SATURDAY 27TH JULY

Saturday is Parkrun and cinnamon bun day in my house and that didn't change this week. My sister and father headed out for their 5k and I headed with them to buy the cinnamon buns, rolls for bacon and also some sunflowers that I'd been eyeing up in Tesco the week before. Unfortunately there was no gypsophila left to go with them but some carnations were okay instead. My grandparents nipped in to join in with the bacon roll shenanigans - I celebrated twenty on the 16th July, and they gifted me a Swiss cheese plant, as per my list, so came over for tea and to drop it off. 

The rest of the day was holiday planning, photo-taking, editing, writing and as four o'clock rolled round, tea and cinnamon bun time.

SUNDAY 28TH JULY

Sunday was as a family day - a lie in and the smell of morning coffee always tells me it's a Sunday, and this one was also spent with some family close-by. We went for tea and a walk at Rushmere Country Park and then out for dinner at a gastro-pub nearby. Good grub and good company makes a good Sunday.

There's No Time Like The Present

Recently I've been having a very particular feeling which I really haven't been able to put my finger on for a rather long time - but the feeling of almost being dissatisfied and unhappy with the point I'm in in my life right now and longing for the future and wishing the next ten years away. And I really hope you're ready for a brain-dump-that-makes-no-sense-disguised-as-a-think-piece as that's what you're getting.

It's a feeling that's really been consuming me and I think dissatisfaction is a huge symptom of turning twenty - I've suddenly entered the next decade of my life, I'm no longer a teenager and I'm paying bills separately this year which feels like the most "adult" thing I've done to date. And I'll be honest - I just can't be bothered. I can't be bothered with the next ten years of my life. I don't want to be a poor graduate, I want to be a successful comedy screenwriter now. I don't want to struggle to save for a house, I want to be living my IKEA flatpack and plants and ceramic double butler sink dream now. I don't want to shout every time I see a dog in a park or a baby at work, I want my own dogs and babies now. You see my point?

Musings On Moving Out

Firstly...I just want to say I LOVE MY FRICKIN BEDROOM SO MUCH. I have never loved anything more than my room at golden hour.

That aside. I thought I'd write a little post just about moving out and moving on as today marks the last week in my second year student house - in a week's time we will be out of here, homeless for a night and ready to move in tomorrow. I wanted to originally write like an advice post for people looking for student houses but then realised that most of that advice is useless at this time of year - I'll save that post up for September/October. But I did have some cute photos of my home and I wanted to use them in a post so Rhiannon suggested doing what I do best, just writing and letting my thoughts about moving out just happen. Believe me, there are a lot.

June Bullet Journal Update

Hello!! I finally did my June bullet journal!! A...week late...but it's here and it's pretty and I'm going to show it to you now.

So for this month's theme I went for this cute little lavender design - those of you who've been around for a while may remember this is a recycled one, I did a lavender theme in March 2018 but I just love lavender toooo much and figured it's been long enough since that one! I actually found this design on Pinterest and just loved it too. I used the Tombow dual brush pen in 623 and two Crayola Supertips for this one. For the calligraphy I've actually gone back to the Tombow fudenosuke brush pens (the soft tip one oo-er) which I didn't think I would do since I discovered the Pentel fude touch pen but I guess here we are? I figured out how to use the Tombow ones properly and I'm loving the amount of small dainty calligraphy I can do with the hard-tip.

Life in May & June Goals

Oh deary me, I can't believe I'm back here writing another update post - I literally don't know what on earth happened to May, I seemed to spend most of it in the library prepping for an exam and working!

Speaking of libraries, I actually...finished second year in May. Yep, I can't quite believe it either and to be honest, I felt very weird about it, I kind of had a meltdown over the fact I really don't know what to do with myself or my future and I'm really not ready for things to change but I do have another year before I need to start thinking...so waters are calm for now.

I got a bunch of other university results in this month too - your gal is on course for a 2.1, which isn't bad but I really did want a first. I also think I need to learn how to stop pressuring myself though and accept that a 2.1 is still absolutely brilliant haha. Tips on that would be appreciated!

I got back into exercising and running over May too, which has really helped. I had a bit of a post-exam post-breakup breakdown and spent a lot of time very sad and crying a lot, and exercise always helps me when I'm feeling a bit shite. I'm planning some posts about mental health soon as it's something I need to start talking about again but that's all in the works. The running is going very well and I'm already noticing myself becoming stronger which is a feeling I honestly just love. The feeling of invincibility, in a way. It's wonderful.